Only Women Can Save Us
It’s early April, a typical Seattle rainy afternoon. I’m staring out my home office window, nursing a Negra Modelo, and for no apparent reason my mind drifts to differences between men and women.
I’m a man. I know men. I’ve played with them, worked with them, competed against them, fought with and against them, hired and fired them, loved some (in a brotherly way) and hated others.
As to women, where do I begin? Women raised me: a mother and five sisters. I didn’t marry until I was forty. I’ve long since lost count as to how many women I’ve “played” with, worked with, competed against, fought with and against, hired and fired, loved and hated. The truth regarding the matter is that I’ve spent more time and have known more women than men. Candidly, I know women better than most men.
It’s been my experience that women are more intuitive, introspective and conscientious than men. Women are curious, worldly creatures. Men, are less inquisitive, their probing predictable. Oh, they’re inclined to explore their world, but rarely do they discover what women don’t already know.
It’s become increasingly clear to me that when man and woman boarded the evolutionary train with one way tickets in hand – they took parallel tracks to get where they were going. The excursion to women was a journey, to men, an expedition. They discovered vastly different worlds, with opposing views, men seeking dominion; women, tranquility. Nothing serious, mind you – just the fate of the planet in the balance.
And where are we now? At the precipice, once again, where covetousness for power has placed us. Perpetual war and the economy in peril, one more misplaced step and we’ll plummet into the abyss.
Given my aversion to disaster and pain, it’s time to change trains. “Oh, Mr. Conductor! Kindly punch my ticket and let me off at the next stop. I don’t give a damn if it’s Podunk just get me off this testosterone driven train wreck.”
I believe when science ultimately discovers the center of the universe; men will be shocked to discover, it’s not remotely – about them.
Women, on the other hand, know that the cosmos doesn’t revolve around them. Their mind and skill sets were honed observing – in quiet desperation – the failures of man. They’ve mastered the art of listening, of negotiation, of putting others before themselves for the common good.
They never cease to amaze me. They’re not in need, nor do they seek and expect constant affirmation; they’re free of primeval trappings, muscled mentality, and military conquest.
They alone can create life, and through life, create the greatest wonder of all, the capacity to humanize all she has borne. They’re truly miraculous creatures, supreme in all of creation – when you stop to think about it.
So why do we turn to men to lead us? Habit? Deference? Masochism? Or could it be that men have always had socioeconomic power to back them up? Hmm, and what enduring good has come of that?
Absent credible political expectations, and my disillusionment with the “stronger” sex, I’ve long since chosen to support and vote for any progressive woman capable of kicking some male ass. I’ve got your back. I trust you to lead – in the boardroom – in the bedroom – in the White House. I don’t give a damn. It’s your turn. Deliver us to our rightful destiny at the end of this track.
“So, what do women want for saving the world?”
Precious little, as it turns out. In a word, as Aretha Franklin virtuously declared. R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Say it slowly. It rolls off the tongue, and maybe with repetition, into our primordial brains.
Personally, and as a romantic, I’ll take it a step further. I creed we should love women unconditionally, as they age gracefully. As their hair turns gloriously gray; as their hard bodies become marble-smooth curved sculpture. As the lines upon their face are shared memories over time.
Come on men, who are we kidding? We’ve operated inside gender-walled privilege beyond recorded history. We need, at a minimum, to recognize women as equals, in actuality, as our saviors. Hubris won’t save us from ourselves.
Women know love. Women want peace in the world and at home. All, they ask, is for their men to share the rewards – to suck it up, to stick it out, no matter what. They want reality, not fiction.
That’s precious little to ask.
I think Gabriel García Márquez said it best in his novel Love in the Time of Cholera:
“Over the years they both reached the same wise conclusion by different paths: it was impossible to live together in any other way, or love in any other way, and nothing in this world was more difficult than love.”
That’s the world “real” men should learn, covet and embrace.
About the writer
Frederico Wilson is the author of “Escaping Culture – Finding Your Place in the World” and President of Hydrostatic Supply an International Fluid Power Procurement and Sourcing company. He’s also the founder of a non-profit consumer advocacy organization (under development), and blogger at http://www.mestizoblog.com focusing on mixed-race and multicultural perspectives and issues.
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